Dear Me....

I know that sometimes it seems you are standing still while the rest of the world swirls by in an abundance of color and sound, but you need to know you are remarkable and every small tiny step brings you closer to the you that you want.

You are scared. I know that you fear that something deep in you is broken. Something that you can't see because you are to close. I know you fear the what ifs and the maybes. But maybe what you see as broken others see as unique and addicting. What if the what ifs and the maybes could bring into your life more life than you ever thought possible?

You hold yourself back from what you love because you measure yourself against your friends, you know the ones, the amazing ones. But you know...so what? You can't sing, you can't paint, you can't dance and you aren't the best writer. But you know, why should you hold yourself back and just admire. You love to design and bring to life craft projects. You are in love with color. And while the pen is not your strongest ability....you have a zeal for it that balances out your inability to use a comma properly. So give yourself permission to enjoy what you do and stop comparing and just respect each person for their abilities and let them do the same. Because you never know, those very people you compare yourself may have had to give themselves permission as well.

I know you worry about the rules and the boundaries. But remember the times when you pushed those limits? When the ride ended you stood breathless, color in your cheeks and thought, I want to go again. Maybe you should let yourself behave badly more often, because lets be honest, those who will judge you don't really deserve you and those who matter will be right beside you.

Have you ever thought the life you dream of, the one you are pretty sure will only stay in dreams, is actually your real life? You know what I mean, a man who loves you, a beautiful home brimming with strangers and pulsates with stories, a giant kitchen that opens to a fragrant garden, laughter, tears, friends and family. Yea. That dream the one you think will never happen because you are average. Don't worry, this is between us, no one else has to know, but you aren't average. You just have to see that. Everyone else already does. Once you do, your dream will become your waking life.

So I give you permission to notice your movement in the vast swirling life of yours. Embrace your oddities and realize that you aren't broken. Bask in the colors and designs of the home and life you want. Get your hands dirty and break some rules. Let no one put rules onto your life that are not your own. Heck break some of your rules every once in a while. And take some friendly advice, wake up. You are beyond average, you are amazing and you shine. So, take a step into your dream and realize you are almost there.

Your very kind friend,
me.


"To be nobody but yourself in a world which is doing its best, night and day, to make you everybody else means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight; and never stop fighting." ~e.e. cummings, 1955